Dear You,
As much as covid-19 has been spreading around the world lately, I think there has also been an equally rapid growth of doubt, uncertainty and fear. Maybe even annoyance, specifically at our parents. If you’re on the receiving end of constant nags to wash your hands, wear a mask and even not being allowed outdoors because of the covid-19 situation, you are not alone! But before we let our frustration get in the way and possibly cause more problems, let’s remember that God calls us to honour our parents and that there are no exceptions to this commandment. So yes, even in the context of covid-19, honouring them is still something God wants us to do.
Why should we honour our parents?
First, understanding our parents’ perspective could help us to understand where they’re coming from and make it easier to honour them. Looking at the situation right now, fear is almost inevitable. In Singapore, the number of cases are increasing, and so are the number of measures the government is implementing. Crowds are non-existent and we’re pretty much having virtual everything. All these changes are scary and in fact, it seems that if you’re a parent of three, you’d probably feel the fear three times as much, having three additional lives to worry about. Adding on the possibility that they might lose their job, our parents do have a lot on their plate. So I hope we can see that, really, it’s understandable that parents have heightened worries and anxiety, especially for us.
Second, God chose them. Parents are the people God has chosen for us. He specifically put them in our lives to nurture and take care of us. He could have very easily placed us in any other household, with any other parents and our lives would have changed drastically. Yet, he chose them. He chose these specific people to be the ones to have parental authority over us. Then surely, honouring them would essentially be honouring God.
The importance of honouring our parents is evident and made explicitly clear in God’s word. In the bible, God didn’t even bother with the long parables and just explicitly said,
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.”
In addition, there is an obvious indicator of the importance of honouring our parents, seen in the living example of Jesus, because even Jesus submitted to His earthly parents.
In the current situation of covid19, it may be extra challenging to honour our parents when they sometimes say or do things you completely disagree with or don’t comprehend the rationale for. However, knowing the importance of honouring our parents, it is also then in this situation that you have to be extra understanding of where they’re coming from and honour them.
How then can we honour our parents?
Honouring our parents during this time is as simple as being obedient. In times where we may be consistently told to do things we don’t want to do or don’t see meaning in, like wear a mask when we’re not even unwell or wash our hands 9273762372638 times, it is very tempting to not listen to them and just disobey. Or obey them, while grumbling and rolling our eyes behind their backs. The very least we could do though, is be willing to be open-minded. Understanding their point of view may not necessarily have to be equal to agreement, but we should minimally respect their opinions as well as why they feel the way they feel. This could pave the way for the sharing of honest opinions between us and our parents, which could very possibly make honouring them much easier eventually.
But…?
However, sometimes we face the unfortunate truth that no matter how open-minded we are, our willingness to be receptive to what they have to say may not be reciprocated by them. I know this is very triggering but our assurance is that God looks at the heart. Our parents, though chosen by God, are still human and are imperfect. They could be in the wrong at times and may not choose to listen and/or validate your thoughts, but know that you tried your best and God sees and validates that. “Every way of a man is right in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the heart.” (Proverbs 21:2)
No one said that honouring our parents is easy. In fact, I’m sure we can all confirm for ourselves how difficult it really is, and sometimes may feel impossible even. Just like how the bible has always warned us how difficult this journey of faith will be, we need to recognise that we cannot honour our parents only relying on our own strength.
“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing”
We need God’s help. To that, God says “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be you wherever you go.” So persevere on ma bros, God is with you!!! :-)
All in all, we have to see the bigger picture and realise that honouring our parents is part of our purpose in life, to glorify God. We know that it is no easy feat, but let’s seek God’s help to try our best anyway, because COVID-19 or not, honouring our parents is part of what we are called to do, as followers of Christ.
Love Noah & Leia